Saturday, April 26, 2008

Have you ever surprised yourself?



We often believe that we know ourselves best. We even pride on the fact that we are complete masters of our mind. And our actions. But there are times when you surprise yourself. -Crying at the most inappropriate place for crazy reasons even when you have fought back tears during worse adversaries, laughing at the crappiest of jokes despite being fully aware of its crappiness, had feelings for the kinda people you never thought you would fall for, suffered silently through gross injustice even when you are a fighter, made friends with the most unlikely people, had lengthy conversation with people you can never relate to, loved the corniest of songs that you are ashamed of admitting, found the gawkiest of people attractive, stood up for the ones who never meant anything to you.

Has any of this ever happened to you?

Trust doesn’t come easy to me. But then, I surprised myself and trusted someone soon. But the person turns around and backstabs me. So I decide to give her the silent treatment. Now that is something I’m so good at. But then I surprise myself AGAIN and talk to her!!! And I still haven’t forgiven myself for doing this!

So how have you surprised urself??

36 comments:

Vinesh said...

I pretty much could predict everything about myself except when I had a brief crush on Paris Hilton. I'm over it, ashamed, and not recovered from the shock.

On a serious note, maybe there were a couple of times something unexpected happened. But only because of the way I said (misworded) something, but I've always been clear about the way I thought about something.. at least for that time.

marvin the paranoid android said...

trust is like fine bone china... once broken it can never become seamlessly joint... and if inspite of that you are willing to talk to that person then after mahatma gandhi you are the next best thing...

Gayatri said...

I surprise myself all the time. But then, I know me and I'm not so surprised :)

Whatever it is you decide to do, never beat yourself up for it. That I know, doesn't work for anyone..

g-man said...

made friends with the most unlikely people, definitely! lengthy convos with people i can never relate to, yea!

i have surprised myself by opening up to complete strangers, only to get stuff really messed up later on. yea, i've talked to a couple of them later on as well. i don't open up any more, not to anyone...n i really surprised myself when i started smoking i guess

Pointblank said...

@vinesh,

LOL..Crush on Paris Hilton... But ur way better than me... I have had crushes even on cab drivers!!!:0 Crazy adolescence!!

@paranoid

Well.. yeah, Mebbe talking to the person was accidental, then it was more like a circumstantial pressure! As I said, I still haven't forgivrn myself.

@gayatri,
yeah.. ur rite!

@g-man
U did good by not talking to them after that! We need to be hard once in a while!

vEENs said...

surprise myself every other day :-/


i do alll of the stuff u knw all of the stuff :-/

BIG Omi said...

Thats meeee... definitely... all the traits belong to me... But thats what i called being natural...
you surprise yourself because you are true...
And talkin about the second part of trust.... its perfectly normal ... you will often face this... the best ways to avoid this situation :
1. Believe everyone trust no-one
2.STOP EXPECTING!!

It works... It worked goods and tonnes wid me..
Take care & Let Go,
Omi

Crimson Feet said...

my 11 year old legs tried to run away when my 13 year old elder brother was being harassed and beaten by an even more senior guy in our school bus.. i was scared and crying because i was the one who took panga with the old guy and my bro came to help me. instead of staying there boldly and fighting, my legs became weak and tried to run away.. i didn't want to run away... he was beating my brother...
but they did... my legs
and i couldn't stop them...

i love my brother... he had some bruises from the fight which i still remember...
and i remember feeling so FUCKED UP and ashamed... i realised i was a born coward.

after that day... i NEVER ever ran away from a situation out of fear... there have been many..

but that day haunts me... i wish i could go back and beat those bastards to pulp!

chandni said...

happens....

and if its any consolation..I am like that too :)

Vinni said...

hmmm...i always believe in one thing, the tougher the enemy, more love you should shower on him. it keeps them wondering. nothing works better.

Sam said...

I guess we all behave against our true nature at times and probably thats the fun of it all!! :D
Hey, I know it goes like 'once bitten twice shy' but don't be so harsh on yourself..

Enigma said...

ohhh ya we all surprise ourselves na....i sometimes burst out crying for no reason and when a reason to wail come i stand there without a single tear....well ya even i am ashamed of myself for speaking to some people who hurt me so much...well life is full of surprises after all and we do need these.. :)

sansmerci said...

i have almost done everything you said .. thats an awesome post gave me goose bums!

i surprise myself all the time ... i realy dono to say no really dono to give the silent treatment, i don wanna trust anyone but i trust them :D if u kno wat i mean ... so ppl can walk all over me .. am a smiling doormat! gosh ! am i shameless?

Shrinivas said...

I surprise myself at times when I am not reacting to the things which I want to...I remain intact..not reacting.
Like vinesh...its Britney for me.

Pointblank said...

@ALL

DAMN!!! I typed dowm loooong replies to each of ur comments n posted it.. and bingo! Duplication error! I lost it all! :( :(:(

Anyways.. what iw anna say - u all r rite at some level.. thanks for the comments.. I appreciate much!

diyadear said...

oh ya gal ur so true.. i rem a certaini christmas party had lots f wine and strated crying.. can u imagine?? in front of all my friends who literally ran away and i am saying to myself y the hell am i crying??? but i just couldnt stop.. sigh

IDriSh LAxmIdHAR said...

wow...i guess ur post is reflection of every individual alive..
some ignore and some don't accept..

i have done lotsa things which i give a thaught later..(however i don't regret about it..)

one day out of lazziness i left my wallet at home and went hurriedly with friend on his bike....
and later i realise that i had no company my way back and have to walk 16 km...
the happy part here is that i had a good excersice for my legs...
lol...

by the way nice posts...something true and realistic...
mind if i add you to my blogroll...????

CM-Chap said...

Its very true... I often surprise myself.

Something I think I can but I was not able to and vice versa

I can recollect so many of them... Can't reveal all of them here :-)

Suma said...

laffing at crappy jokes, ohh yes done it all...

and ignoring somebody is something i just can't do :(

i am full of surprises...guess that's why life is sooo exciting!!!!

Keshi said...

Im a walking SHOCK to my own self. :)

Keshi.

Aaarti said...

hey
Me gonna blogroll u too..:) love reading the stuff u write here..

yep,i have surprised myself couple of times... called up a friend i'd not spoken to for ages and renewed the bond; given an impromptu hug to mom; giving grandparents a treat when they least expect ... its always a wonderful experience when i sit back and think abt these...:)

Beauty and the BEast said...

I must say I HAVE more often than not surprised myself; both pleasantly and otherwise.

I have been there, where you describe and done what you have done. And till date have no answers to the why..

Reign said...

hi!
well yeah , surprised at times like "had feelings for the kinda people you never thought you would fall for".

nice blog dear! ;0)

Ps said...

Usually I dont surprise myself as I know me too well.
Did you think about why you stopped the silent treatment? Maybe your heart forgave.

vEENs said...

yello LADY? Wherezz u?

D said...

Yes, I've surprised myself by doing everything in life I never wanted to do!

Gangsta Markiv said...

I wake up alive everyday and that is the biggest surprise factor for me.
Well if I were you I never would have spoken to that person. Well that is a different me that not many know but it surely does not make sense to talk to a person when you are thinking and knowing that another incident you tell her she is going to run into the town telling others about it.

So, in that sense, I think you should not really talk. Besides what is the point by just surprising yourself. Well, we as humans have our own unique way of self defense. Some have this profound guilt feeling about anything, some just don't react - comfortably numb etc etc.

Quite an interesting write up this.

Chriz said...

happens to everyone... it has happened to me too..

d SINNER!!! said...

lemme think, lemme think...

i have...ummm ...ummm...

mebbe thats a surprise in itself ...i dnt remmember...

:)

addict said...

nice blog... very similar to mine or may be i rite on similar topics as u... havent checked on ur birth date! ;)
i agree with the last para the most. I keep repeating it not 100 times... but till infinity exists

addict said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
addict said...

Surprising oneself keeps happening if he/she believes and is confident about emotions!
And on losing and gaining trust part... There is a saying in Kananda that translates in english to - Its an year for a Potter but a second for a log/stick/rod. So it takes a long time to trust but to break it.. just a couple of moments required!

Shades of Grey said...

Well, to NOT talk to the back-stabbin b**** would only make you feel worse because what she has done to you would be a constant reminder. so forgive yourself for having forgiven her - like great wine, take time to mature.

Will post something asap!

Ria said...

Yes it happens!like in my case i always knew the fact tht there cant real friends in a professional environment...but i ended up trusting a gurl in my office who in turn happily back stabbed me!!So the point is v do end up surprising ourselves many a times.....i kick myself for trusting somebody so soon!!

Vinesh said...

read this again, and had one more thing to say. there have been many relationships i have tried to get out because of the bad treatment i was getting...

but surprised myself by finding out i couldn't get out of them because of the good things that i WAS, somewhere in between, getting!

Pointblank said...

@Vinesh

Thanks a lot for coming back and reading this again. That rarely happes to me ;) I feel honoured!

Awwww! U were treated badly??? Which heartless woman was that???

And then, should I ask u what the good things were ;)